"At that time it would have been a lot of money for me. I think my wife was struggling. I knew I was struggling. There was no way mentally I could have even considered putting myself through this trauma. I actually left the country. I went to Pakistan. I never wanted to come back." bague emotional Tottenham vs Norwich - Premier League, kick-off 2pmDecember 11: bague emotional Rafiq told the Digital, Culture, Media and Sport Committee on Tuesday: "Pretty early on at the club, I joined a dressing room full of my heroes, Michael Vaughan, Matthew Hoggard, part of the 2005 Ashes team. And it was just the most surreal moment for me. bague emotional "I didn't feel like they did that because they were concerned for me or worried for me, I feel that was done to tick a box in case I killed myself." bague emotional